We’ve all made some questionable decisions in our time. Lucky for these Worst Hair offenders, it takes no more than a respawn or restart to rectify lapses of judgment in the video game world. That’s not the case in the real world: Choose your hairstyles wisely, as your public humiliation is always a mere Internet post away. Here are the perpetrators of the five worst hairdos (aka hairdon’ts) in video games. Let them serve as a warning.
Seymour Guado (Final Fantasy X)
Some people are on the cutting edge of hair fashion, while others — like Seymour — should just cut it out. Take note, existing and aspiring hipsters: When looking for love, sometimes less is more. It starts with the ponytail and beard, and then comes the hair bun, until finally…the purple mane of maiming. Yes, it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye during the first kiss.
Sheeva (Mortal Kombat series)
It takes a special type of woman to pull off a Mohawk, and unfortunately, Sheeva isn’t one of them. It’s difficult to figure what’s exactly amiss with her follicle fashion statement, but there’s a sneaking suspicion that it has something to do with the six horns protruding from her head…or the four arms…or the three fingers per hand… Whatever. Something doesn’t add up.
Blanka (Street Fighter series)
Time for a Seasonal Color Analysis intervention, Blanka: Just because Halloween is in the fall doesn’t mean you’re an Autumn. The whole garish color palette thing worked for the Green Goblin because he’s rich, okay? Just back off the hair dye, do a little beast-scaping, and let people tap into your electrifying personality!
Amy Sorel (Soulcalibur series)
That fact that Amy had a rough childhood deserves empathy, but there’s a fine Grand Canyon-size line between a girl looking sweet and innocent and one looking to land Mr. Sugar Daddy. This is a classic case of trying too hard… And what’s up with those hair capsules? Pop a couple of rubber straw tubes in those suckers and you’ve got the makings of a beer helmet.
Heihachi Mishima (Tekken series)
Considering the number of macho game characters sporting chrome domes, it’s a bit surprising that Heihachi is so obviously uncomfortable with male pattern baldness. Honestly? It doesn’t matter how much molding putty you use; the whole look just screams, “Combover fail!” Just accept the you that is you and let it shine through… Even if it blinds people.
What do you think? Do you agree with these worst hair selections? Leave a comment with your picks. But don’t forget to burn all photographic evidence from your hair metal days first.
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