Today's Woot Write-up
A bike just isn't a bike unless it's a ZIKE BIKE! And a person just isn't a person until they GET ONE!
Do you have a bike? YES!
Is it a Zike Bike? NO!
Does that make you a total loser? YES!
Should you ignore that last comment and just be happy with who you are and what you have? NO!
Would buying a Zike Bike from Woot immediately remedy your loser status? YES!
Could what we're doing right now be considered a form of cyber bullying? YES!
Do we care? NOT EVEN A LITTLE!
Are we compensating for our own shortcomings by manipulating you into buying a thing we've artificially elevated to the level of status symbol so that we feel superior by being more "in the know" than you about cool things? YOU BET!
ZIKES BIKES!
Get one, YA LOSER!
EXCLAMATION POINTS !!!!!!!!!!!!
